I'm
hoping there is still light at the end of my tunnel, I have 9 days to
find another Host Family and I'm doing everything I can to make that
possible. Technically I can stay in the Netherlands for 90 days
legally but I don’t have money like that. As it is, I'm already
staying in a shelter for stranded Au Pairs. It makes me feel a bit
better to know that its not only happened to me, but at the same time
it totally sucks.
My
Former Host Family went through Triple C, and by extension I am their
Au Pair, in a sense. I'm not however able to get rematches through
them, but on my own I can do it and they can help me. So I'm on my
own, and I really do not want to go home and explain what happened, I
don’t think I can even put it all into words, I swear I am running
on adrenaline if I didnt feel so completely numb. This is how I knew
I was upset, I havent eaten since 12pm yesterday, and all I ate
yesterday was a bowl of yoghurt.
I
hate this situation, but I'm trying to make it better, and not give
up. I want to have no regrets for coming to Holland, and I already
have one. I wish I had never met them, I tried to give and take, you
know, I was doing a lot of giving on my part they werent taking, and
then they said I wasnt giving. I'm tired and I'm not going to think
on them. I slept two hours last night..or this morning really. It's
hard to sleep somewhere you know longer feel welcome.
Anyway,
like I said, I'm trying to find my Silver lining, and Operation Find
New Host Family is a go! I have so many things I havent had a chance
to see it, it would be a horrible pity to leave now...I've only been
here 3 weeks...not even a whole month.
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